Tag Archives: Life Lessons

Recent Life Lessons

1) Sometimes reaching ANY decision is better than employing too much time for the optimal decision. Many times, the time element is just as valuable as the decision itself. Word.

2) When you set an expectation or a deadline – stick to it. Don’t break it. If you have to break it, inform the stakeholders in advance and setup another more firm deadline to meet. This way stakeholder confidence is not compromised. Stakeholders = anyone (not necessarily from a business perspective – even friends). You want to be seen as a person who does what they say. Reliable. Wzup.

3) Many times when we receive constructive criticism or ways to improve, we (or atleast myself) think, “But that’s not me, it doesn’t fit my character, that’s not who I am” – but we fail to realize that what we need to do is take that criticism and fit it into our own personal style. E.x. You wear shoes and someone suggests you wear boots – that doesn’t mean there’s only one type of boot, there are hundreds; you choose which fits you best. Dumb example – but illustrates the point in a very understandable way. Chyeah.

Lessons to Manifest

To not forget the realizations that have been streaming thru my brimming mental capacity…

1) All I can be is thankful for the opportunities provided, the people I’m surrounded with, and the personality type I’ve been blessed with; I honestly believe and truly hope it’ll lead to some exciting, safe, and grand life experiences. Moving to DC has opened a world of opportunity, excitement, possibility, and personal development. I’m understanding myself as a person, as a professional, and grappling with so many projects which are helping me develop insights which were buried deep in experience I never before had the opportunity to seize.

I think sometimes many assets of your personality repertoir at face-value seem pointless, irrelevant, or additional with no value-add; but if practiced and used correctly it organically opens doors you would never expect. I’m certain of this. I’m certain everyone has a set of personal skills which can enable them to achieve positive things they may have never foreseen. I think my set of skills is a perceived enthusiasm, perceived energy, a fixture smile, and the ability to interact with others in a positive way. Some of this may be real, some may be perceived, either way I can see it coming together to generate a life-path I would not have expected or guessed. Truly a blessing. I believe my intense extroversion is a springboard for wild adventures, random situations, but yet a burden which compels me to be frequently surrounded by others to maintain a mental balance… aka not tweak.

2) It is almost impossible to predict the next 1-2 years of your life. Almost impossible. A very common phrase I had personally heard when I was young from my elders was, ” I would have never expected life to turn out like this” – not sure whether this was implied in a good or bad context, but the point was they would have never guessed where they were in the current moment of time even a few years ago. This is 100% true. Graduating college I thought I was going to work for the Islamic Relief NGO. Here I am consulting for the federal government with IBM, Government clearance, knee-deep in startup and freelance work, and a pending opportunity to do economic development overseas. Never would have guessed this when I was booted out of highschool – long story. It has been seven years since I started college, never ever would I have expected the drastic personal and professional changes I would experience. It is truly impossible to predict events to come within the context of where you currently are, life’s variables are too many.

3) Confidence is ONLY built through credentials. Credentials are defined by what you value you most in terms of personal development. If you truly feel you’re progressing in the attributes you value most, confidence is sure to follow. Confidence cannot be simply developed from an empty repository, it’s impossible, it’s arrogance and inflated ego. Confidence is the golden attribute which is only nurtured by achievements which you personally value; that’s true confidence. I frequently compare myself to others which are much more achieved than I am in my life and in effect bring my mental state down to a “why-not-me” analysis (which can be very destructive), but the more I distance myself from that unhealthy thought pattern and place myself against a more general canvas, I am able to unearth my strengths and use them better. The more I do this, the more confident I become, the more confident I become the more I achieve, it’s a continuous loop – a healthy one.  One, which in the end-result, produces more good.

This weekend I attended several social occasions and realized a magnetic effect when I was truly being myself. I attended a networking event today where I briefly explained my current endeavors, mixed with my true personality; I again noticed this magnetic effect. I was one of the last to leave. Not to ego-trip; but the point is when your personality is genuine, and your mental state is good, others can see it – and feel it, and potentially be inspired by it.  The confidence only generates a stronger magnetic effect.  I was just nominated for an IBM Service Excellence award (which if awarded will have multi-faceted benefit), I was published in my alma mater B school magazine, and have some great opportunities in implementation.

ENFP – The Champion

“…The most outgoing of the Idealists, Champions often can’t wait to tell others of their extraordinary experiences. Champions can be tireless in talking with others, like fountains that bubble and splash, spilling over their own words to get it all out. And usually this is not simple storytelling; Champions often speak (or write) in the hope of revealing some truth about human experience, or of motivating others with their powerful convictions. Their strong drive to speak out on issues and events, along with their boundless enthusiasm and natural talent with language, makes them the most vivacious and inspiring of all the types.”

My looped track right now

Life Lesson

The two keys to interpersonal success

What is the sweetest sound to anyone, regardless of race, spoken language, ethnicity, culture, etc?

1) Their Name –  Say their name, remember their name.

What is the one thing all humans absolutely crave?

2) Appreciation – Be lavish in serving it even when the end result may not have been what you wanted/expected.

If you can leverage these two facts to every interpersonal situation you encounter, you will indoubtedly be successful.

A quick example – Why do you dress a certain way? Why do you work longer hours at your job? Why do you go out of your way to do things that you may otherwise not have to do?

There may be components of many reasons embedded, but boiled down to the bare bones, it’s that desire to be appreciated, be noticed, be complimented, be wanted. Why do people want to be celebrities? Why is it human nature to talk about yourself? Why do we always talk about ourselves more than others?

Think about it, then apply it!

A Moral Buried in Stress

I was given an offer through my company, at the beginning of the new year, to work as a contractor with a very reputable company out on the west coast.  The position was a couple steps above my current position on the totem pole, but the terms & conditions of the move were a bit shady; so it was a really difficult decision to make. I wanted it, but I didn’t want it at the same time – this statement sounds all too familiar, right? Anyway, my contact was very aggressive about it – we deliberated about the opening frequently. Finally, I made a decision – and when I did, it was already too late, and said aggressive contact had given the position to someone else. Literally, a day late, a buck short. I was thrown off balance for a week+ involving lots of ice cream and consolation.

A month and a half (approx) later, I get an email from the aggressive contact saying, “hey, that position you wanted has opened up effective almost immediately, do you want it?” This is after he told me he wouldn’t have anything for a year. Well, hard work put in, after missing the great opportunity, I landed a gig 5x better right within DC (which was nice after having a messy break up in the beginning of the year, I had a support structure in the city to help) — including many benefits i’ll leave unmentioned here (if interested, ask me about it) that I would not have received at ‘the great company’. I have a feeling the other person they found to fill my position didnt quite cut it, or bailed on them, or any other # of things that could’ve happened, or maybe they just needed additional help?  Not only did I get a position I really wanted, but aggressive contact also reached back out to me, something I never expected to happen.

Moral of the story: Sometimes in the moment, you want something so bad, and dwell on ‘how it was supposed to be’ if you miss it, but with enough resilience and confidence, something better is almost always waiting around the corner. Whether that be a job, a girl (or guy), an opportunity, etc. If you ever had a bad feeling about something — it was for a reason, the key to forever progress is in reflecting on and learning from your mistakes.