Monthly Archives: November 2010

Difficult Positions

I stand in a position where below me I see a hole, deep within the depths of this square hole, broken through the grass and dirt, lies an open and empty coffin. I tilt my head up and look into the light blue sky with scattered clouds. Above me I see a thin river flowing, it slowly winds through my field of vision. Within the thinly sliced river I see a green snake swimming at an alarmingly fast paced, moving in the shape of an S being written indefinitely, it slices in and out of the water. In my right hand with my palm facing up, I am holding a seed. In my left hand, with my palm facing down I’m holding a wick which is slowly burning. Around me is quiet and sunlight. A breeze gently develops and the clouds above begin to move forward. The snake falls from the river and lands in my right hand where the seed is, where it rapidly consumes it; and the burning wick now is flickering. The sky grows somber and I fall into the open casket. With the last drop of light leaking into the quickly closing casket I see the thin river overhead changing its’ direction.

Networking events

Washington DC can be summed up in a few key words: politics, Bens Chili Bowl, brunch, and networking.

There are three types of connections you make in DC, and quite possibly the world at large for some, friends, acquaintances, and professional connections. Friends are real, acquaintances are that massive conglomeration of people that you “sorta know but don’t closely associate with” due to lack of common ground, social anxiety, lack of motivation, etc. And then there are professional connections. This term is likely very applicable in the sphere of DC where climbing the ladder means making large networks of people that will be able to help. Sometimes professional connections can be friends, but rarely; many times they are acquaintances. Rarely do they help you if they are neither in your social sphere.

I’m not advocating the development of professional connections, I’m just pointing out the reality. When I meet people, I like to know them at a relatively personal level. The people I simply do not connect with (something I think I, and many others, figure out within 5 minutes of meeting someone) I keep at as an acquaintance.

Networking events are interesting, I attended one last evening and it was the same story. Break into each somewhat ongoing conversation, learn the names and positions (including some history), and discuss the current situation. This type of conversation gets old but at a networking event, it’s almost necessary. You can break the social norm and discuss topics outside of these foundational blocks; but it can be difficult especially if no common ground is shared.

I consider myself hyper-social, my mood is directly affected when I’m not around others. At the same time, i’m not one for large social events i.e. big networking events or parties. I used to be, not anymore. At this point I want to hack the block of people and find the few that I truly want to develop some sort of relationship with. Many others I meet at these events I find distant or almost intentionally choose to bar themselves from you. That or maybe in the silent exchange of adjudicating looks and personality they are either putting you as their acquaintance or simply dismissing you. Or perhaps they lack confidence in a social setting like a network event to open up to particular personalities. I don’t know.

The Lady in the Coffeeshop

For the past 3 days I’ve been coming to the same coffeeshop to do some work (fri-sun), and since I’ve begun coming here, I’ve noticed the same lady, in the same seat, here everyday that I am. Everyday it’s always the same thing. She’s in the corner by the window, at the small table, seemingly pensive, either looking out the window or around the coffeeshop. No books, no music, no computer. She’s there for what I would imagine to be hours at a time. And I’ve only begun coming here since Friday, how long has she been coming here and reliving the previous day?

It’s a bit saddening, everyone’s lonely and looking for any sort of comfortable social company. Finding that, especially outside of school, is an entire puzzle in itself, but this article sort of highlights the tragedy of this woman’s situation.

Emotions are contagious

After reading The Tipping Point – Malcolm Gladwell, which I thought was a great book, one point rang really true.

Emotions are contagious, just like yawns and smiles. I think if you have two different polar emotions in a single room, there will be some sort of equalizing affect. I’ve noticed it in my own life. It’s interesting. If you want someone to be happy around you, be happy around them.

On another note – I’ve been spending way too much time in coffeeshops on laptops lately. I really need to get out more.

New beat – the Beginning, I’ve been on a synthy beat kick lately.

Last nights dream

I was in a mosque, on the second level, of what seemed like a fire escape. The lower level was crowded, it was one large carpeted area below. Prayer had just begun and there were loud clapping sounds from outside. This caused confusion on the inside and people were speculating as to what was happening, then someone suggested it was gun fire which struck widespread panic and fear to the constituents below. I was on the second level with maybe a another person or two. Then the front door swung open and armed gunmen ran in with assault rifles and begun firing on everyone below me. I realized they were firing rubber bullets however. Everyone hit the deck. Then I woke up. Scary.

Yesterday for the first time in my life I had ‘sleep paralysis’, where you become conscious during REM sleep, are in an awakened state, but your body still cannot move. This lasted atleast 2 minutes, also scary stuff.